The Search for Inspiration

The Search for Inspiration

The Sun wakes before my eyes, burning free, far far away. As you are born from the horizon, you remind me I have to face another day among the living. I feel dead inside. My face’s pale, my heart’s quiet and my breath’s cold as a winter’s night. I fear every step I take, knowing that it could be my last. I can see from the trees that it will be a windy day. It doesn’t matter, my skin can’t feel the wind anymore. I feel empty. What would I see if I look at my image in the mirror? Maybe I don’t even have an image to look at. Would I have courage to look at myself? Would I lose myself in my eyes? Every piece of hope seems to run from me. I got just one objective that I hope I can accomplish. I know that it’s my last chance to make me feel alive again. I must go and seek for inspiration. My last hope. I gather all my strengths and leave my hideout. The door closes behind me, there’s no way back. It is windy outside. Will I hear a whisper in the wind? A clue, a word? I wait. It’s all too silent. I must move on, I need to be enlightened. I can’t let myself fall deeper in the dark where I live. Inspiration will be the light I’ll shine. It’ll break the chains inside and tear this pain away. I walk forward. Fear walks beside me. I know these streets but somehow I feel like I’m lost. Am I? I must have no doubts. I know where I am and I know I can’t stop walking, not yet. I try to stay out of the shadows, I feel safer under the sunlight. It’s cloudy but the sun seems to dodge every cloud. I stop. There is something here, I’m certain, but what is it? I look around me. And there it is. It’s me. The image I can’t face. But I have to face it. My eyes look sad, and my body looks fragile. What happened to me? Was I too weak to fight? Maybe I was, but I’m not anymore. I won’t suffocate under my own darkness.

It’s time to dive into my soul and find the memories I can’t let go. Memories of times where I still smiled. They are the little light I seek. The light I’ll shine. They show me what I was. They show me what I must be. Now I’m not afraid to face you in the mirror. I now stand still before you. My face’s regained its color, my heart’s pounding and my breath’s warm. I’ve made it. I am I, once again. I can feel the wind again and I walk against it. Inspiration walks beside me…

Written By: Myself (muaaaaahhh)